31
Aug
16

Independent Baby

I will never claim to be a great parent, but I try hard and have not killed either of them yet, so I think I am winning. As the girls have gotten older, I have come to appreciate their independence and the freedom that comes with having teenagers. That being said, I really do try to be a good parent and present as much as humanly possible.

With the new school year, however, we have new challenges with my being present. My younger daughter has a zero period class meaning she has to be at school over an hour before her sister and it is her music class, so she is transporting her instrument. Being nice, I have been driving her which makes me leave around 10 minutes after waking up my older daughter.

In the afternoons, my older daughter has marching band until 6pm. If I go to the gym after work, it is generally from 6-7 or 7:30. So on good days, I will see my oldest from 7:30 to 11. However, she is not a night owl and is usually in bed between 9 and 10. So I get a big hour and a half some days with the kid.

Mondays are a little crazy, but this one was a bit more than the norm. We did the new normal for the morning. I saw my oldest just long enough to wake her up. My younger had a lesson from 6-6:30 which threw off my time, but I was out and about when my older got released from band, so I drove her home. After I picked up the younger, I headed to the gym where I met my best friend and we worked out for an hour, then we went to pack some of her apartment for an upcoming move. When I got home it was 9. Both girls were in the bed-shocking! Really, it was. I figured they would be up to chat a bit at least, but since they were not, I ran back out and had a drink with my friend.

Tuesday, was another off day. The morning was normal. I did get to see my oldest for a minute because she was not feeling well and skipped band. I saw her for about 15 minutes when I ran home to pick up my younger daughter to go to Back to School Night. We were there until 9, and I had a late dinner with the girls which was immediately followed by my oldest dragging her butt to bed.

I have seen my oldest for maybe an hour over the last two days. During this time, she has tried to talk to me about her school stuff, but even while I am there, I am going in a zillion different directions. She brought this to my attention yesterday afternoon as she told me that she does not have a mom these days. She is an “Independent Baby.” That’s right. She is not an adult (her words), but does not have a mom this week.

Initially, I was amused by the comment. Honestly, I still am. This week has a lot more going on than most. I would love to be more present and I guess I could, but that would require eliminating things that I value like being a good friend. I am really thankful that I have an “independent baby” that can handle being on her own a bit from time to time, but after the last couple of days I am looking forward to a little slow down.

 

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