09
Feb
17

Dating Chronicles: Out of Options

It finally happened. I had a lunch date with the guy that I have been talking to for months. Really, it was not a terrible experience. Although, I have to admit I was a little disappointed. There was no spark.

While I am a little disappointed, it really did not surprise me that there was not. The last few days prior to actually meeting things had gotten to be a bit too much for me. Ultimately, an unsolicited dick pic was probably the final straw for me. But I had to see it through.

The guy was nice enough, but our encounter was awkward. Honestly, I knew it likely would be just because of nerves, but he had said just enough during prior conversations that I was more so than usual. Ultimately, meeting him confirmed my suspicions that we would not be a good pair. There was no click. I dreaded him attempting a goodbye kiss. Luckily, I managed a quick awkward hug and made a super-fast get away.

Now, I need to find a nice way to say that I am not interested. I am seriously struggling. Scaling back our conversations until I can find the right words or he gets the point, whichever comes first.

A couple of things struck me about the encounter.

  1. Maybe I am not as into dating as I thought I am. The idea of giving this guy more of my time stresses me out. The thought of talking to someone else does the same. So much time and effort with little to no return.
  2. Old habits die hard. All I have wanted to do since the bad encounter is call Mr. On Again Off Again. Nothing good can come from that, but he makes me feel good about myself and goes on his merry way. It is appreciated. Not the healthiest relationship ever, but we know I am not the poster child for emotional health.

So, that happened and another one bites the dust. I am officially out of options and pretty okay with it at the moment.

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