Archive for the 'Health' Category

03
Jul
17

Welcome, July!

July is finally upon us and the month is off to a bang!

I purposely planned for May/June to be light and relaxing. It definitely had its moments, but getting sick was not planned for. Luckily, I am finally on the mend. It is a good thing, too, because this week is not gonna give me any breaks.

I am excited for this week. It is jam packed full of fun and it is much needed.

Monday: A regular work day (may be cut short as I doubt anyone will answer my calls), my final class begins and I am hoping to return to the living and reconnect with my best friend for Monday Margaritas.

Tuesday: Volunteering at the fireworks stand and then a family cookout

Wednesday: My kiddo’s bday! I am working from home, playing chauffeur and hosting festivities in the evening

Thursday: A night out with my mom and sister!

Friday: A quiet night at home

Saturday: Fairystone State Park with family and friends

Sunday: Road tripping to take my youngest daughter to stay with family in NC (I love road trips!)

No more time to be sick! This week, I take back some of my life. I purchased breakfast and snacks for work, meal planned for evenings we were home, and will try my hardest to get in some exercise-it is time to start working on myself again. With any luck, the rest of the month will be productive while being just as full and fun!

29
Jun
17

Down with the Sickness

Over the last couple of years, I became accustomed to running on fumes. I work full time, have been going to school full time, and try to maintain a normal lifestyle for my kids, animals, and myself. This year as my classes began to wind down, I purposefully scheduled myself a break.

Since mid-May, I have just had to work and try to maintain. It has been nice, but surprising. I do not know how to function without the chaos. I miss having a lot going on and apparently my body does, too. I have been sick for the past two weeks.

Honestly, I am not sure that anything could have prepared me for the constant state of “ugh” that I have been in since getting sick. I guess my body just needed a break and this was the best way for it to get what it needs. I think I might be finally over the worst of it and be preparing to bounce back which is good since my schedule is about to pick up again.

The last few weeks have made me reevaluate a few things. It is time for me to be a little better to myself. As much as I like the chaos, I need to do better with my health. I do not ever want to feel like this again if I can help it.

No crazy plans are coming from this revelation. However, a few changes need to start happening in my world.

  1. I need rest. It is time for this mama to have a bedtime and try to stick with it.
  2. I need exercise. I feel better when I am working out regularly and I am paying for a gym membership. It is time to use the thing again.
  3. Eliminate the junk; I need to stop putting crap in my body and wondering why I feel terrible.

Saturday starts a new month. I think it is the perfect time for me to institute changes. Plus, starting then gives me a couple more days to recuperate. Hopefully, my next post will be from a much happier, and healthier, Ornery Dame.

21
Mar
17

Seasons Change

Seasons change. Today was the first day of spring and I guess my feelings are appropriate considering, but I cannot seem to shake the feeling that I need a change. Really, the fact that I am feeling this way is a little surprising; I just had a week of break from my classes and thought I would be somewhat recharged. Instead, I am exhausted.

That is probably a good place as any to start. I am exhausted. It is not just an “I could really use a nap” kind of tired, either. It is a tired that I feel in my soul. I have an unrest of sorts brewing somewhere deep inside of me and it is manifesting itself everywhere.

I feel it at work. I have zero ability to concentrate lately. My mojo is lost. I had a strong start to the year and now things are slowing. Honestly, it is natural considering the work that I do, but it still makes me anxious. Sitting at the desk for eight hours a day with no real results kills me. I glanced through the want ads today, I do not think another job is the answer and there was nothing that I wanted to do.

I feel it at home. I want a new house. I am tired of fighting over bathrooms. Tired of stressing over neighbors, traffic, and bushes. I want a place where I can find peace. I also want to be in my current neighborhood, my mortgage payments to be cut in half, and a fenced in backyard for the puppos. Yeah, I need to get a grip.

I am feeling it in my relationships. My kids have a decent understanding of my funk and we deal. They act like teenagers, I snap, we make up, repeat. I have my on again off again relationship which works for me to a point. Now, it is working quite well which is probably not a good thing, but I have little desire to deal with many others at the moment. That is kinda sucky. I am talking to a couple of people, well, sort of talking. I owe a return call to one that I am supposed to go out with Friday, but I have come to realize that I despise the phone and if that is required for a relationship, I might be in trouble.

I am feeling it physically. I am tired. I am so blah. I finally got to the gym for a bit this evening for the first time in quite a while-it was excruciating. I have gained back everything I had lost. I am eating out too much. I am drinking too much…alcohol, soda, yep-if it’s bad for me, just add it to the list.

It is time for the season to change. Maybe for a few to change considering this brain dump. Perhaps the equinox hit at the right time and I can start fresh tomorrow. Of course, the fact it is almost two hours past my bedtime does not lead me to believe I won’t be tired again tomorrow.

02
Jan
17

New Year, New Goals

As the first day of the new year is coming to an end, I figured it was about time to put some thoughts into writing. I have not been the best over the last few months as far as my blogging goes, but I really think that kind of goes along with life in general. It has just been a lot.

For me, however, I cannot really say that 2016 was all that bad. Sure we lost some icons and a huge election, but really it was just a bleh year in my book. Yeah, I gained back everything I had lost and still have not a lot to show for my efforts in a lot of areas, but we are all healthy for the most part. We have a roof over our heads, food in our bellies and I am pretty blessed as far as people go in my life.

All of that being said, it is a new year which means it is time for some reflection. It is time for new goals and some new perspectives. My goals this year are fairly simple as reflection has led me to believe that I need to focus my energy in a few areas and I am hopeful that doing so will make me successful in those areas as well as others.

2017 Goals

  1. No Online Dating
  2. Finish School
  3. Travel More
  4. Prepare Oldest for Adulthood
  5. Get Healthy
  6. Work on Finances
  7. Work on House

No Online Dating-I know, it is probably a shocker and might be a little disappointing as many of my posts are about my dating disasters. However, that is really what most of my experiences with online dating have been. Frankly, it is soul draining. I know there are normal guys out there on the sites looking and that a girl has to kiss a lot of frogs, but enough already. I am taking a year off. I will date when normal guys approach me and ask me the old fashioned way. I cannot believe I wrote that without laughing-I have very low expectations for myself in the romance arena in 2017.

Finish School-I am actually pretty excited about this. Last semester was tough and I mean real tough. I have to repeat one of the two classes I took last round which throws off my degree completion plan. Luckily, I can still walk in May as long as I repeat the class this summer. My plan B was adding a minor and going until NEXT May which would have worked, but the thought of it made me cry a little.

Travel More-This is another one that makes me happy. My oldest is playing at Carnegie Hall this spring and I am hopeful that we will be in the audience for the performance. I also booked a cruise for June as a graduation celebration for myself and the girls since they are the poor souls that have to put up with me. Hoping to get in a few camping trips, as well. The gypsy in me is itching to get out and explore!

Prepare the Oldest-Sigh. I hate this, but love it. My oldest is 17 and as much as I want her to stay forever, it is time for me to really start setting her up for what is next. She is working on getting her license which terrifies me. Home girl needs a job and a car. This summer, we will have to start really looking into college options.

Get Healthy-I lost my way. Since starting to work on my Bachelor’s my efforts towards healthy living have gone to the wayside. It is time to get back into the gym, cut out sodas, and eat better.

Work on Finances-This is a no brainer, really. I need more money, less debt, and to be set up a little better in case of emergencies.

Work on the Casa-I have a lot of vision, but not a lot of follow through. It is time to make shit happen and fix my house up the way I want it.

13
Nov
16

Making Changes

When we started this year, we (my friends, family, and I) were coming out of a ridiculous 2015. I felt like I was in a good place for the most part and those of us that were not had a lot of hope for the following year. That being the case, we (my best friend and I) coined the year with the catch phrase, “onward and upward.”

We had good intentions. We gave it our best effort.

Honestly, for the most part, I cannot complain. I am still pretty darn lucky. I have a job, a car, a roof over my head. I have friends and family that I like to believe love me. 2016 has not been anything to brag about, but like I already said, I cannot complain.

Despite all my blessings, I have felt very blah over the last few months. Since August, I have fought illness and tried to manage to keep everything in life going full speed ahead. It has caught up with me. Throw in the added unnecessary bullshit that has come with the election and I am just tired. Tired of everyone and everything that is negative and unnecessary.

Over the last week or so, I have started to make a few changes and so far, like staying in last night (and all week actually) instead of going out to the bar. Today, I went into work for a couple of hours to prepare for the week. I folded all of the laundry and did a few things around the house that I would normally do during the week. Really, nothing I have done is mind-blowing, but I feel so much more at peace tonight after disconnecting myself a bit and taking care of business. I think some of these things are going to become my new normal. Hopefully, the changes will help next year to be better than ever.

19
Aug
16

Reflecting

Confession. I have not always had the best self-esteem. Hell, I still do not. But I have come to the realization over the last year or so that I am actually pretty darn awesome.

I work in a career that allows me to help people. I make a difference. Granted, I do not get to help as many people as I would wish, but I still make an impact. And I can always do more.

I am a good friend. I keep my circle small, but those in the inner circle know that I have their back.

I have a great family. Seriously. My siblings tell it like it is and encourage me to do better. My daughters are my reason for living and bonus are two of my closest friends/confidants (within reason). My parents and grandma love and support me and the girls. And I still have a huge network of my ex’s family that is involved not only my kids’ lives, but in mine as well.

I will probably never be a skinny girl. I was never the one the guys fell over and may never be, but I have come to realize that I am not as hideous as the old me once thought. I have good hair and eyes. I might be shaped like a potato, but I clean up okay. Hell, I am my own kind of hot in pinup.

Physically, I am strong. Stronger than I was a year ago, and continuing to get stronger each day. I have come to enjoy the gym not just because of the activity but because I am able to free my mind for a bit.

Spiritually, I am a little more at peace and I am comforted knowing that the big guy upstairs has my back.

Mentally, I still struggle some days with self-esteem issues. I have my good and bad days dealing with depression. I overthink and stress, but it never keeps me down for long.

I am far from perfect, but I do have a lot to be thankful for. I love this life that I have created for myself and that is constantly changing. I am a lucky girl.

27
Jul
16

Buckle Up

Next Monday is August 1. Summer is over. Done. Finished. Really it was over this Monday, but August seals the deal. This week some of it has started with my oldest starting marching band, but the next few weeks will really seal the deal. By the end of the month, both girls back in school and extracurricular activities will be back in full swing. Looking forward, the fall is going to be insane. Football games, marching band competitions, RYSO practices, dance lessons, viola lessons, etc., etc., etc.

And then, there is me. As the keeper of the chaos, I am involved in all the above mentioned activities, but I also have my own life to maintain. In addition to my regular, full time job, I have registered for my fall classes last night. I may regret it, but I am going to go full time. I really want to push through going full time amidst all the chaos.

I have got to get back in the game and work on myself more with regards to diet and exercise. Hoping that August, while being hectic, can be a good starting point for making some changes to carry through for the rest of the year. It is not too late for me to hit my goals if I really try. So, I am going to give it a shot.

My social life might suffer, but I am kind of feeling like there is not a whole lot there as it is. My best friend and partner in crime has become distant over the last few weeks. Such is life, but it makes me sad. Luckily, a few of my other friends have resurfaced enough to keep me from getting overly depressed and the pinup group I am in has a lot of activities that will take place in the fall. I am too social to be happy just staying home all of the time.

Otherwise, I have had a few dates over the last couple of months, but nothing that has led to anything I am overly excited about. The one that I was most interested in has gone silent as many tend to do and as much as I do not mind putting myself out there, I don’t want to appear desperate. I am really not. I keep debating on looking more, but I really don’t know that I am even that interested. Of course, drunken me and lonely me will sometimes take the reins and make me look for a minute or two now and then. But it will take a special person to want to deal with all that I am going to have going on, so not sure I should really bother.

There ya have it. Looking forward, I think the remainder of the year is going to be rather interesting. It will be fun to see how well we can all manage with everything we have going on. Hoping to get some organization in place over the next few weeks and that I can get the girls to buy in to helping out a bit more moving forward so that I might maintain some sanity. Regardless, I think we all need to buckle up we are gonna be in for a wild ride!