Archive Page 2

06
Jun
17

Vacation Brain Part 2

We are in the home stretch! Today is Tuesday and we leave on Friday for vacation. Unfortunately, that means that my mind is in overdrive. As much as I love travelling, I am a ball of nerves whenever I leave.

I have created some killer packing lists this time for the trip and, thanks to being a clothes hoarder, can almost pack now and still have clothing to wear to work daily. In related news, do you have any idea how much sunscreen redheads should take on a trip to the Bahamas? The answer: a LOT. I have seven bottles going on this five day trip.

I absolutely despise coming home to a mess. Generally, this is because I jump right back into my crazy life. That being said, I have broken down my house so that we have a good chore list for everyone. If all goes well, the house will be in better shape than it is in normally when we get home.

I still need to run by the post office and stop our mail. I will likely do this task today at lunch. I was not thinking yesterday and made an online purchase which I am assuming may be delivered while we are away. I am hoping that it will be delivered snail mail; otherwise, I can hopefully sweet talk my best friend into intercepting the package for me in return for a beer when I return.

The animals. Poor little boogers are being displaced while we are gone. Taking the guinea pig to my parents so my youngest brother can watch her. The dogs are going to the vet to be boarded. I am trying to use all of the dry food we have up prior to leaving and will have to stop and buy more before the trip. Looks like I will be planning a trip to the store again Wednesday or Thursday…

In related news, while we are not having any real issues, I am planning to bug bomb once everyone and everything is out just to be safe. Guess I can pick that stuff up while I am getting a new bag of food for my furry friends.

Finally, I think the only other thing which I need to worry about is work. This is actually my slow time of year, so I am not terribly concerned. I am planning to put up away messages on my voicemail and email. I will reach out to everyone that I am currently working with to let them know I will be out and, then, I should be home free and clear. I will not have access to internet or phone for the trip and is should be DEVINE!

Only a little time and a lot to do. Obviously, I have quite the to-do list going. I cannot wait to have everything accomplished and be able to relax for a bit!

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24
May
17

Don’t Blink

We are coming up on the end of the school year and while I am thrilled to get a break from waking up my beastly teenagers daily for the inevitable fight over what they are trying to leave the house in, I am a little sad.

It hit me Monday. We had our annual band banquet. It was my oldest’s fourth since she started marching in 8th grade. For most of the kids she started marching with, it was their last. Her friends are leaving-moving onto college, military, or whatever real world activity their heart desires. It was bittersweet. I am so proud of all the kids and have grown ridiculously attached to a handful of parents that have become my friends over the last few years. We have bonded over games, competitions, parades, and the gazillion volunteer activities that we tirelessly participate in for our kiddos. We are coming up fast on the end of a major chapter.

This time next year, it will be my kid that is preparing the leave the nest. That kid that just started to drive alone in January. That kid that I had to teach how to put gas in her tank. The kid that has to be told periodically to take her clothes downstairs to get washed. The girl that procrastinates on every single project. The kid that is one of my favorite people in the world….

Over the next couple of months, we are going to go visit the two schools which appear to be the best option for going away to school. We have fourteen months until she spreads her wings. There is a lot of planning and prepping that will need to take place.

It seems like only yesterday that I was sending her off to preschool. Now, we are looking seriously at colleges and preparing for senior year. Don’t blink, people. They do not stay little long.

17
May
17

Vacation Brain

The struggle is real lately. I am itching for a break and my vacation is not coming fast enough-23 days, but who is counting? Haha.

For real, though. I don’t think I have ever wanted a vacation so bad. My senior year at Liberty has taken its toll and work has been stressful. My kids are pretty much the same way. My younger daughter is especially excited to go. The first year of high school has been trying.

So what are we doing? Shopping. Too much shopping. On the plus side, most of it is actually needed. We purchased swimsuits last week. I found a cute towel yesterday. Last night, I purchased luggage for my younger daughter-she needed a set anyway since she will be going to Europe next year and it was an early bday gift. I think the only other thing I need to buy is sunscreen and a lot of it with two redheads travelling!

I have also arranged for my dogs to be boarded and the guinea pig to be watched.

We are leaving the day prior to leaving port to break it up-gotta figure out where we are staying or if we are winging it as far as hotels go.

I am starting to do mental lists. I want a massage and pedi before we leave if I can swing it. I am creating a list for my outfits because, you know, gotta look good. Need a master packing list.

Otherwise, I am just a girl sitting at my desk, daydreaming about laying in the sun, listening to the waves, and not having any access to cell phones, email, or social media.

28
Apr
17

Coming out of the woodwork

April has been a funny month. The few weeks have been kind of interesting when it comes to my interactions with the opposite sex. It has been funny, there really has not been any new people added to the mix-just old ones coming back around.

I took a chance a few weeks ago and put myself out there with Eric, the motorcycle shop owner. We had chatted a bit and talked about getting a drink, but it never happened. I was going to be out one night and asked him to meet me. He said okay and for me to text him when I was free from an obligation. By the time I texted, it was kind of late. He didn’t respond and did not show. The next day he said he had fallen asleep which I can see happening. He has since gone quiet again. I am kind of over it.

The next one resurfaced partially because of me. I was bored and got back on pof. Apparently since I recreated my account, it showed a guy that I dated last year that I looked at his profile. He hit me up almost instantly to say hey which was fine. It sounded like there was a chance he might want to go out again, but he has yet to ask. He randomly said hey yesterday. Taking that as a good sign. He is odd. I feel like I may need to put myself out there with him and try to initiate. However, I have no freaking clue how to start that.

Then, last Saturday night, my younger brother and I went downtown. He is 12 years younger and we do not look like we should ever be a couple, but for some reason people like to think he is my date when we go out. That being said, we went to a bar that I enjoy. As soon as we got close to the bar I remembered that I had chatted for a bit with one of the bouncers ages ago. Just my luck, he was working the door. Well, he didn’t seem to remember me and I was not gonna be that girl. I did not see him again. I did get a message from him the next day asking if I was on a date and saying that he would like to have relations with me. I told him that I was not interested in that kind of a relationship-love sex, but not with random people I do not know.

And, finally, following the bar downtown, we hit up my home bar. There, I saw the guy that ditched me on our one and only date. It was kinda funny. Either he didn’t recognize me or was hoping that I was not going to speak by pretending not to know me. There was nothing for me to say regardless. Hoping that it was a fluke and he won’t frequent my favorite bar often.

So, there you have it. April was at least interesting. Maybe once my school semester ends, I will actually put some effort into finding new people to add to the mix. For now, I will hope to hear from the one pof guy and see what happens next.

12
Apr
17

Better Sleep Tonight

Sleep and I have not been great friends lately. There is just too much going on for me to ever hit my sleep goal and, when I do sleep, I have been having awful dreams. Normally, I am not one to dream much at all, so the situation has not been my favorite.

Over the weekend, my dreams took a very unwelcomed turn and I started dreaming about an ex. In my dreams, he comes into my home and refuses to leave which sounds harmless enough, but is slightly terrifying for me. While things were not overly nasty between us, I have a lot of unsettled hard feelings as I later learned that he had cheated (he is now married to the woman he cheated with) and really feel like I was used throughout the relationship. These are the dreams which I seem to be most likely to remember and they are actually provoking a physical response-I am pretty certain that I am grinding my teeth.

All this being said, imagine my surprise when he randomly starts messaging me wanting a favor.

I am pretty sure I am psychic. Somehow, somewhere deep inside me, I knew he was about to pop up and my body didn’t like it.

On occasion, I do some freelance work for friends/acquaintances. He asked what I would charge to do a project for him. I quoted him my usual price hoping he would decline, but he has asked that we move forward.

What I found funny happened today. He reached out to me a second time to provide me with some information I needed and to provide me with instructions on how to proceed and to let me know that he would pay me after I provided him with the finished project. He would “drop it by.”

Um, no sir.

You do not get to take advantage of me again. Period. I do not mind the side job, but I will not be providing finished project and put faith in this man to do the right thing.

There will be no coming to my home to “drop it by.”

I put my foot down. I said I would be in touch when it was complete. We would meet, he could review the work and pay me. Only then will I turn over the finished project.

I feel somewhat empowered today. I stood up for myself and took control of the situation. Hopefully, in doing so, I can sleep a little better tonight.

27
Mar
17

Dating Chronicles: I cancelled

I cancelled.

Last Friday, for the first time in almost two months I had a date planned. He seemed nice enough. Normal enough.

I cancelled.

I really thought I was interested. I was on spring break and bored, so I started online dating again. He was kind of cute, decent personality, and I thought it might be worth exploring I agreed to a date and we planned a week out.

Initially, I was excited. He seemed really nice and into me. Honestly, those things have not changed. However, my interest started to decrease quickly as the date approached for a few reasons…

  1. He wanted to talk on the phone. A lot. I talk on the phone for a living and my evenings are full. I have no interest in chatting it up with someone on the phone.
  2. Conversations when we did talk were one sided. This could be partially because I hate talking, but omg try to engage the other person.
  3. He was pushy. We had not met and he was already talking about second dates and asking what I was really looking for down the road
  4. He still had up pictures of his ex on social media (I did not stalk to find this, but noticed after adding him)
  5. He social media stalked me

None of these were huge issues, but compiled, I just got a bad vibe. On top of already feeling ill, he was just too much.

21
Mar
17

Seasons Change

Seasons change. Today was the first day of spring and I guess my feelings are appropriate considering, but I cannot seem to shake the feeling that I need a change. Really, the fact that I am feeling this way is a little surprising; I just had a week of break from my classes and thought I would be somewhat recharged. Instead, I am exhausted.

That is probably a good place as any to start. I am exhausted. It is not just an “I could really use a nap” kind of tired, either. It is a tired that I feel in my soul. I have an unrest of sorts brewing somewhere deep inside of me and it is manifesting itself everywhere.

I feel it at work. I have zero ability to concentrate lately. My mojo is lost. I had a strong start to the year and now things are slowing. Honestly, it is natural considering the work that I do, but it still makes me anxious. Sitting at the desk for eight hours a day with no real results kills me. I glanced through the want ads today, I do not think another job is the answer and there was nothing that I wanted to do.

I feel it at home. I want a new house. I am tired of fighting over bathrooms. Tired of stressing over neighbors, traffic, and bushes. I want a place where I can find peace. I also want to be in my current neighborhood, my mortgage payments to be cut in half, and a fenced in backyard for the puppos. Yeah, I need to get a grip.

I am feeling it in my relationships. My kids have a decent understanding of my funk and we deal. They act like teenagers, I snap, we make up, repeat. I have my on again off again relationship which works for me to a point. Now, it is working quite well which is probably not a good thing, but I have little desire to deal with many others at the moment. That is kinda sucky. I am talking to a couple of people, well, sort of talking. I owe a return call to one that I am supposed to go out with Friday, but I have come to realize that I despise the phone and if that is required for a relationship, I might be in trouble.

I am feeling it physically. I am tired. I am so blah. I finally got to the gym for a bit this evening for the first time in quite a while-it was excruciating. I have gained back everything I had lost. I am eating out too much. I am drinking too much…alcohol, soda, yep-if it’s bad for me, just add it to the list.

It is time for the season to change. Maybe for a few to change considering this brain dump. Perhaps the equinox hit at the right time and I can start fresh tomorrow. Of course, the fact it is almost two hours past my bedtime does not lead me to believe I won’t be tired again tomorrow.




Twitter Updates

  • RT @Bollingmargaret: Bottom line: parenting interferes with my ability to be lazy. 9 hours ago
  • RT @MunkMania: My Dad said he wanted tools for Father's Day, so I brought my ex and my boyfriend. 1 day ago
  • RT @nayele18maybe: If I invite you to my house, there is a 97% chance I need you to fix something that is broken. 1 day ago
  • Weeks of constant running leaves one broke, exhausted and with a mountain of laundry. 1 day ago
  • Bouncing back from a huge disappointment is proving harder than I could have ever anticipated. Gotta get my emotions back in check. 1 week ago
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